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WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND?

1 Reason We Shouldn’t Compare

14 comments | July 18th, 2012

(OOC via CNN)

Keeping up with the Joneses has been part of the American way since at least the 50s.  We compare oursleves to what they havem he, has, she has almost incessantly and certainly inextricably.  There was less to compare ourselves to, fewer data points and inputs and our social circles were limited to who we knew in the physical world, pre facebook et al.  But now, oh girl.  from the CNN report:

"Because of social networks, though, the field of competition has expanded dramatically. Now you're competing with the best pictures and the ebullient status updates of every girl you know. 'It's as if somewhere along the line, Facebook became the encyclopedia of beauty and status and comparisons.'"

If we've got a minute to spare we might just check out what's up on FB (or tw, or whatever).  And BANG BOOM ZIP, all of a sudden we're confronted with what she did, he did, she has, the party we missed and weren't invited to, the dinner that those guys had together, the fun, the laughter, the the the the…everything we weren;t a part of and/or don't have.  Talk about hating ojn our happy.

Oh, so what's the 1 reason we should stop comparing ourselves?  Because it doesn't matter and it rarely makes us feel better (is that 2 reasons?)

DYK, 50% of girls under the age of 18 have photoshopped their FB and TW profile pix?  What it is it we're comparing ourselves to?

We are who we are.  Let's be the best version of that and not worry about what she has, is, looks like.  Just because the Joneses are having a blast, doesn't mean your life sucks.

Who do you compare yourself to?  Why?

 

 

 

 

14 comments

  • Mandy J.

    Posted on March 21, 2012

    I compare myself to my sister my mom my BFF and my classmates. Also everyone I see on the street in a magazine or on line. I do not know why I do it or how to stop doing it.

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    • OOC

      Posted on March 22, 2012

      That’s a whole lot of comparison, Mandy J. Stopping it – to whatever extent you can – probably starts with recognizing when you’re doing it…catching yourself in the act, as it were. Only when we realize what we’re doing can we change what we’re doing. Don’t give up on it, or you. XO

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  • Seisa

    Posted on March 21, 2012

    It’s so human to compare ourselves It is also self-defeating to then judge the comparisons. Compare and contrast is ok, judging the contrasts is where we get into emotional turmoil IMO.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted on March 21, 2012

    Saturday afternoon I was killing time on line. I checked out a friend’s feed and was like ll whoa, how come everyone’s meeting later without me? I’m just old enough that I remember when there was no facebook, and these guys might’ve ll been hanging out without me and I wouldn’t know. I think it’s better that way sometimes.

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    • Tracy

      Posted on March 21, 2012

      I’m with you! I liked it much better when I didn’t know I was missing out on something and it wasn’t in my face if I did know. Know what I’m saying?

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  • H.M.

    Posted on March 21, 2012

    I compare what I am to what I want to be. Not looking so good at the moment :(

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    • OffOurChests

      Posted on March 21, 2012

      Where you falling short, in your own mind? Who or what’s shaping what you want to be? Arrrgggghhhh, ideals can be so frustrating.

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  • Sarah Hawkins

    Posted on March 21, 2012

    http://sp2011hawkinss.blogs.lincoln.ac.uk/ Thank you for this post, I will share it on my blog, which is about this topic kind of as I want to make my solo performance that i’m doing on my drama course about not judging people for their differences. :)

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  • Tracy

    Posted on March 21, 2012

    Comparison is the root of all evil. Or jealousy any ways.

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  • Momof2

    Posted on March 21, 2012

    I’ve gotten better about it, but I used to compare myself to other moms and beat myself up about being less than. Now I try to take a breath and say to myself, “Everyone is different. What we see on the outside is not always what is really going on. We all struggle.” I still compare myself, but less often.

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  • Haley

    Posted on March 22, 2012

    I love the quote from FDR that you tweeted yesterday about comparison stealing joy. It’s so true.

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    • OOC

      Posted on March 22, 2012

      Thanks, Haley. Yea, actually it’s Teddy Roosevelt. Amazing quote…comparison is the thief of joy…made even more amazing given when he said it, and thinking about how different the world is now. And how much easier it is to compare ourselves to so very many more people than when Teddy was riding his horse. XO

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