Happy Making




#bodiesMade My Day

3 comments | January 30th, 2012


(story submitted by Flat Girl, a Chestist)

Here's a happy tale, from what we presume is one of our younger readers.  But no matter your age, feeling good about being you is what we're all about.  Here's "Flat Girl" speaking her truth:

I'm finally going to say this. I'm flat-chested. Very. 32-A!

I've always been tormented for how puny I am. My sister used to call me a 'concentration camp kid'. I'm not anorexic. I'm just tiny. Women with big breasts always seem to get the men. Always. Not just in movies, in real life too!

Then one day, I was shopping for bras. I was embarrassed because I had to buy the smallest ones. But a woman working at the store came up to me and was so nice.  She told me not to be embarrassed, and helped me pick out some really cute ones. She told me she used to be just like me, afraid to change in the locker room. Then she pointed out how many beautiful women are flatchested too! She made me feel so good, now I show off my chest like they ...

Love & SexHigh School Romance & Lessons Learned

3 comments | January 27th, 2012

chestist blue

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

If you manage to make it out of High School in one piece it can be easy to look back on those loves, lusts, and infatuations and laugh at the intensity and future-of-the-world import they all carried.  When we're going through them though, there's nothing funny about it them all.  Nope, nothing.  Here's her story:

I'd had feelings for him since we met. We’ll call him Lewis. My sophomore year he asked my friend Nicole to homecoming after playing us both at the same time for a while. It was a slap in the face, so I asked him to Turnabout. He said yes, but then started dating a girl we’ll call Shelly, so I told him he could go with her instead. He then asked another of my good friends (Elizabeth) to prom, a third slap in the face, to hide the fact that he had been cheating on Shelly with my friend Claire. They broke up and, as you can expect, started dating Claire for real. I pretended not to know about the cheating because Claire is one of ...

Happy Making1 Thing You Need To Be Happy

2 comments | January 25th, 2012

Chestist typewriter 2

(story originally submitted as a comment, by Lori, a Chestist)

Last week, we had a story up asking you guys what you thought you needed to be happy.  One of you wrote this in reply.  We thought it was a pretty great answer and contribution to the conversation.  (Thanks, Lori.) What do you think?

There is only one thing anyone needs to be happy, no matter what: the willingness to CHOOSE happiness. Because there's always something to be grateful for, even if it's only that you're alive and breathing.  And gratitude breeds happiness. I aspire to this ideal myself but miss the mark too frequently for my tastes - but I'm getting better all the time and, in doing so, am spending more and more of my life feeling REALLY happy! :) {end story}

One of the things we love about Lori's comment, is her ready ackowledgment that even "knowing" what the one thing needed is, she still misses the mark.  We've always beleived that happiness is a practice.  How do you guys practice happy?  What do you think about Lori's ...

#chestismsWhat Was It You Expected?

2 comments | January 23rd, 2012


(by OOC via NYT)

I had a spinal tap years ago.  I expected that it would be wildly and deeply painful.  Fact is, it was over before I knew it started and I didn't feel a thing.

There was an interesting story in the NYT a week ago, about the difference expectations make - be they high or low, good or bad - in determining our sense of well-being.

As we read the article (and we suggest you guys do too), we couldn't hep but wonder if managing expectations is really all about managing disappointment...whether ours or another's.  Really, how often have you gone to a movie or read a book or gone to a restaurant or listened to a song that everyone's talking about and thought "I liked it, but not as much as I expected"? 

New Year's Eve. Thanksgiving.  Anniversaries, Birthday's, Saturday Nights, a first date, your wedding, your 20s, our parents, children, friends....??!!  Filled with expectations, right?  Turns out that when we expect something to happen, there's a "general release of dopamine"  (that's a good thing), but when our expectations go unmet "our ...

Love & SexMs.

6 comments | January 21st, 2012

Sketch 2011-01-23 16_29_37(2)

(submitted by OOC)

This was a question Maureen Dowd from the NYT asked about and during the hearings for Supreme Court Justice Kagan.  We've been talking to a lot of unmarried women lately, friends and such, and it seems more than a couple of them wold feel better being in a bad marriage than no marriage at all.  We don't get it, but who are we to judge what works for them?

What do you think?  Is the difference between single and unmarried age or a mindset?  And what about you...would you rather be (or have been) in a bad marriage than no marriage at all?  Is marriage something you think completes your expectations of self?  Let's talk about it.


#lifestagesThe Happiest Girls Are the Prettiest Ones

7 comments | January 18th, 2012

party girl

(Story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

We're betting not everyone will agree with the short story that follows.  We don't.  But we do get it.  Here it is, from one of you:

Somedays you feel like the prettiest girl in the world and other days, you look at other girls and feel ugly in comparison.  And what i've learned in the great words of Audrey Hepburn is that "...the happiest girls are the prettiest girls."   And I think it's true. {end story}

Heidi Klum does seem to have it pretty good, right?  But who knows if she's really happy, and what we here @OOC HQ do think is that like having money, being pretty, is probably better than not...but in and of itself it's no guarantee of anything.  But that's just us, what about you?  Do you think Adurey and our writer are right?  Are the prettiest girls (and boys) the happiest?  What's that mean for those amongst us who aren't "pretty"?  Let's talk pretty.  Go.  

Happy MakingKnockout

6 comments | January 13th, 2012

Chestist typewriter 2

(Story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

We've got no more context for this story sent us by 1 of you than the story itself, but we like it because it sounds so triumphant.  Here it is:

I fought the man and won! {end story}

Pretty succinct, right?  And yet there's so much to it.  So what about you?  What battles have you fought lately (feel free to include those with yourself...often the most formidable of foes)?  Did you win, lose, or call it a draw?   How's fighting make you feel?

As always, you can share anonymously.  Let's get ready to ruuummmmbbbbbllllleeeee.


Happy MakingI Wish

9 comments | January 13th, 2012


Go on, make a wish.  Share with us - and each other - one thing you wish for.  It could be for you or someone else.  Or both, or maybe all of us.  Here @OOC HQ, we believe we have to speak it outloud, share it with another, to help the universe bring wishes to fruition.  Go on...what do you have to lose?  What are you wishing for?



#chestismsDrew Barrymore on Happiness

1 response | January 13th, 2012


"Happiness is a choice.  You have to choose it - and you have to fight for it." 

The woman speaks her truth and the truth.


#chestismsHome. The Word of The Day.

7 comments | January 12th, 2012

cloudy talk burst

We said"home"...what (or who) did you think of? 

How'd it make you feel?  Go on and #discuss.

#chestismsTom Ford, a Chestism

3 comments | January 7th, 2012

older men

We'll admit it unhesitatingly; we're crushing on Tom Ford big time.  Someone flipped us the documentary OWN (that's Oprah's network in case you were wondering) did and it's amazeballs.  In it Tom says this:

A few times in my life I've had moments of clarity; where the silence drowns out the noise and I can feel rather than think.

We thought it was so simple - yet so elegant and profound...to say nothing of an acknowledgment of how hard it can be for all of us to feel...truly feel and just BE...rather than think.  But enough about Tom...let's talk about you. Can you remember moments of real clarity in your own life (you like how we worked "own" back into it)?  What did it FEEL like?  Where did it lead you?  Let's #discuss.

#chestismsI’m Normal

2 comments | January 6th, 2012

chestist soup

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

Oh how we love this story sent in by one of you, let us count the ways:

What if they find out I'm worried about what they think about me? What? Seriously, tha's about as anxious as you can get - worried that they'll know I'm worried. It is twisted.

That's what's been going on in my head lately. Here's the deal. I have been working really hard the past 2.25 years or so, at cleaning up my life. After a decade of living like the long lost member of Motley Crue (circa 1985-1989ish), I kicked the booze, cigs, bad food, naughty friends, and replaced them with water, chewing gum, healthy food, and well, nobody. I'm OK though. I have a couple girls at work that I'm close with, great parents, and a couple of awkward online dating dates here and there. That's enough for now. What I am struggling with, however, is trying not to make this recovery turn into the never ending quest for perfection.

Right now, I'm in the so-proud-that-I've-got-things-together-don't-ever-let-anyone-know-I'm-still-human mode. Somewhere along the line, in my life cleaning, I ...

#thecumulativeeffectEinstein and The Secret to Happiness

4 comments | January 5th, 2012

enjoy your life

(by OOC via PsychCentral.com and originally by Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.)

We've spent a lot of the past year focused on and talking about how to make the world a happier place for women and girls, and an easier place for women and girls to be happier.  Like the article below, we come across the tension between "success" and "happiness" a lot.  We've seen it here, on OOC, and it's fundamentally the exact tension that lead us to start OOC to begin with.  Check this out:

"It seems like an increasing phenomenon that a number of individuals are finding themselves with a psychic emptiness at some point in life. There is some kind of dissatisfaction, an uncertainty as to why they feel so unhappy and what will help them feel more complete. This runs rampant with people who have acquired some kind of success in life and find their minds saying, now what?

Albert Einstein once said 'Try not to become a man of success but rather a man of value.'

Today we’re driving our kids more than ever ...


20 comments | January 3rd, 2012


(Story by Mir, from WouldaCouldaShoulda.com)

It's early January, which means we are legally obligated to engage in smalltalk about our feelings regarding the new year and all of the great things we vow to accomplish therein. As a middle-aged woman with a tween and a teenager, I should:

A) Reiterate that I am not sorry to see the past year depart. B) Be repenting for my holiday overindulgence and vowing to lose weight. C) Make sure I am too drunk at all times to even discuss. D) All of the above.

In reality, I'm not gonna lie---part of me is far too busy recovering from Christmas throwing up all over my house to even consider this topic, but another part of me resolves to stop resolving. Yeah, I said it.

Look; I've been through this New Year's thing plenty of times in my life. I've stayed home and I've partied. I've tried to ignore it; I've tried to embrace it. I've made resolutions and I've refused to change one bit. I've broken habits, forged new ones, eaten better, exercised, focused on my family, focused on my work, focused on ...

#chestismsWhat Movies Inspired You?

7 comments | January 2nd, 2012


First, we owe a big apology to whomever the original source of these specific quotes was, because when we first clipped it (months ago), we clipped carelessly and left out the original url.  We know, not cool. But whomever they are, they did such a nice job pulling a handful of inspirational lines and thoughts from the archives of film, that we hope they won't mind if we share them here even without proper attribution.  If it was you, please forgive us - and please let us know and we'll modify right away. Everything that follows, until our questions, is from the original piece:

"You get what you settle for." This inspirational quote was in the film "Thelma and Louise", starring Susan Sarandon. It's a pretty straight forward quote, with a lot of meaning behind it. What you get out of life is what you try for. If you settle for less, you will get less.

"Do or do not. There is no try." This quote comes from "The Empire Strikes Back", and the famous Yoda recites this inspirational message. ...