#lifestagesNot As It’s Supposed To Be

9 comments | June 3rd, 2012


(story submitted by CHN, a Chestist)

I just graduated from college.  I don't have a job and I have no prospects.

I think I have to move back in with my parents, which means I have to leave the city, boy, and friends I love.  I'm educated, smart, and I got good grades.  Why does the future seem so bleak?  This is not how it was supposed to go.  (end story}

Whether you've just graduated or not, there are times when things don't seem like they're going as they're supposed to...what do you do?  How do you cope and/or turn them around? 

Happy HatingRisk Losing

5 comments | June 3rd, 2012

Chestist Sun, red and black

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

When I was a kid I was really competitive.  If i didn't win I sulked, no matter if it was Candy Land, soccer, tennis, boys, grades or anything.

Lately though, I find myself competition averse.  If it comes down to winning or losing, I do not even want to play.  Sometimes I wonder if it is a reaction to when I was younger.  The thing is I think I need to be more competitive since everyone else is.  Can I win if I don't risk losing?  {end story}

Are you competitive?  Does losing hate on your happy, motivate you to play harder, or make you not want to play at all?

What I Really Want

5 comments | June 1st, 2012


(story submitted by Anna, a 38 yo Chestist)

I'm completely bored out of my skull by my job and work. I sit here at this office all day long doing nothing. I let the work pile up all week and then power through it easily all in one day - in just a couple of hours. I get paid very well. I'm miserable.

Today I'm doing something about it. No, not quitting this job - yet. I'm here early today and will stay on top of all my tasks from now on so that I may make room for bettering myself, creating a plan for WHAT I REALLY WANT and using this huge amount of down time to my advantage.

I'm tired of being sad 40 hours a week, feeling like a paralyzed lobster in an ever-hotter pot of boiling water. {end story}

First, big ups to Anna for taking control of her happy.  Do you use your down time or do you stew in it (like a lobster)?  

Happy HatingI’m 23 and Never Had a Relationship

6 comments | May 30th, 2012

chestist enthralled

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

 I'm 23 and have never been in a relationship. Sometimes I feel ok about it, but on days like today it gets me down. I've dated but never really come close to being with anyone. I've never even slept with the same person twice and sex is generally a soulless experience when you don't give a damn about the person you're with and know they don't really care about you. Most of my closest friends have been in and out and back in relationships over the years I have known them. I almost feel like my life is at a standstill, no growth, missing out on something that seems to come so easily to everyone else. It's just so frustrating, especially when I'm given the 'when you least expect it' mantra, because I'm not expecting it and haven't for a long time. I know there's nothing wrong with me, but sometimes I can't help but wan't to ask 'what the hell is wrong with me! why am I always on my own?'..not everyday but on some days..like ...


8 comments | May 29th, 2012


(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

It was my fault and I know it and she knows it and I still can't bring myself to say I'm sorry. {end story}

Wasn't it Elton John who sang that "sorry seems to be the hardest word"?  Are you apologetic when you have reason to be?  Is saying you're sorry hard for you?  Why?


Happy HatingFuck You, Voice!

9 comments | May 29th, 2012

cloudy talk burst

(story submitted by C, a 26 yo Chestist)

Even when things are going well, I can't just be happy.  Why is it so hard for me? Why do I take offense to everything? Why do I still believe this voice that tells me that I'm going to fuck everything up no matter how hard I try?

FUCK YOU, VOICE!!! I'm not going to take a fucking pill to make you go away. I'll just prove you wrong and defeat you like the little cowardly bitch that you are. Now if you'll excuse me, I have more important things to devote my time and energy to. {end story}

We all have that voice in our heads.  How do you shut yours up and out?

Happy HatingI Can’t Quit You

4 comments | May 28th, 2012

yellow sun rays

(story submitted by SFG, a 24 yo Chestist)

We were in college when we started dating.  I'd had a few boyfriends in HS, but nothing really serious before him.  I think he taught me how to be in love.

Now it's 2 years after we graduated and we're still together, I'm just not sure we should be.  I tried breaking things off once a year ago and it just didn't work.  I think he tried once too but I'm not really sure.

I can't tell if we're supposed to be together or just too scared not to be.  {end story}

You ever been in a relationship, could've been romantic or even professional, where the fear of not being together is what kept you from leaving?

#bodiesEating Disorder

7 comments | May 26th, 2012

cloudy talk burst

(story submitted Anonymously, by a Chestist, on rewind)

I was never the fat girl, but I was never the thin girl either. I wasn't the ugliest girl, but I was far from attracting the attention and admiration of anyone either. I had flaws, but I wasn't a flaw. And this is how I felt during my years as a teenager.

I went through puberty at a very early age. Nine years old to be exact. I always felt special-- being the tallest, being the biggest. But those feelings changed once I entered middle school and learned thin was in.

I continued to gain weight a grow, and by seventh grade I was 5'3" and 150 lbs. No one ever said to my face that I was fat. I only felt that I was because I was surrounded by prepubescent girls and t.v. shows like America's Next Top Model, that praised and glamorized size 0 bodies. And growing up in a home with a constantly dieting mother and Barbie Dolls to play with, I knew I should have been thinner.

And to be honest, I could have eaten healthier and ...

Happy HatingDon’t Blame Me

8 comments | May 24th, 2012

black explosion chestist

(Story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

DO NOT blame me because you did not do what you were supposed to, that's not fair. {end story}

You can feel the anger here.  Some people find it easier to blame others than accept responsibility themselves.  Can you relate?  Have you ever done it yourself?  (We did - once.  Really, just once.)

Happy MakingI Love Therefore I Am

10 comments | May 24th, 2012


(story submitted by Lola, a Chestist)

I love singing loudly when no one can hear me.  I love designer clothes.  I love my family and my friends.  I love dogs (I'm not that into cats).  I love beaches.  I know, who doesn't?  I love dancing.  I love long weekends.  I love that feeling when you've wondered if something good will happen and it does.  I love kids (but I don't want any).  I love being in love and wish I was.  I love that I know I will be and I love that I don't worry about the fact that I'm not.   {end story}

Ah love.  What - not who - do you love?  (Ok, you can tell us who if you want to.  Why?  Because we love you.)



Happy HatingCan I Take A Nap. Please.

4 comments | May 24th, 2012

Chestist Sun, red and black

(story submitted by Exhausted, a Chestist)

How's my day start?  My day starts with my wondering when I can go back to bed, if I can sneak a nap at work, if I can pretend I'm going to a meeting and go to a movie theater to sleep for half-an-hour.  I sleep fine during the night.  No tossing or turning, no teeth grinding (at least not since I got a mouth guard).  I just want to go back to bed.

Most days I don't sneak to a movie and don't get to close my door and drift off for 15 minutes, and that's fine and I keep functioning, some even think at a high level.  I do think about it though and wish I could close my eyes for just a bit even as I write this.  I do plan my Saturday mornings around my Saturday naps so that nothing can take it away from me.

Some of my friends think I'm depressed.  I'm not depressed, I'm just so tired.  Maybe I have that Yuppy-disease from the 90s.  {end story}

What about you, ...

Happy MakingRandom Acts of Niceness

5 comments | May 22nd, 2012

chestist soup

(story submitted by Juliet, a chestist)

Complaining about people is easy mostly because they deserve it.  So many people seem to forget that it is nice to be nice which is why when people are it makes such a difference.

Someone I know but who I wouldn't consider a "good friend" just did the nicest thing for me so randomly.  Not only was I appreciative, I was inspired.  I need to be nicer too and I will be.  {end story}

What was your last random of act of niceness?   What can you do right now?  What are you waiting for?

Happy HatingGood Manners

5 comments | May 19th, 2012

50s chestist

In my family we were raised to say things like "thank you", "you're welcome"; "please"; "I'm sorry"; all in the appropriate context of course.

Yes, we were raised with manners, to be polite, and to be respectful of the actions and feelings of others.  Even to this day, I have to say "thank you" every time the wait-person refills my water glass, removes a plate, no matter what conversation I wind up interrupting to do it.

Lately I have been struck by how impolite most people are.  I don't just mean in social situations or in places like restaurants, but with each other.  Ok, maybe it's just with me. 

I know it may seem like a little thing, but impolite people really get under my skin.  Say thank you.  Say sorry.  Say I'm going to be late. Say something, anything that acknowledges the situation.  Mea culpas and gifts aren't needed, just a little commmon decency and good manners.

One day I'll have kids and I can promise you one thing, they may not be smart, talented or good looking, but they'll be polite.  {end story}

Does rudeness ...

#bodiesIn The Mind’s Eye

9 comments | May 17th, 2012


(submitted by Chan, a Chestist, an OOC rewwind)

Sometimes what we think we see and what we think others see may not be the same thing.  Sometimes that's good; sometimes it sucks.  Here's what one reader sent us:

"I have this... thing where, in my mind's eye, I'm thinner than I actually am.  Catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror can be devastating.  It's not that I don't know I'm overweight: I just don't *see* myself that way, so when it's shoved in my face, it's startling to say the least." [end of story.]

Does anyone else have this mind's-eye glitch? What's the difference - if any - between what you see in the mirror and what's in your mind's eye?

Tell Her One Thing

3 comments | May 16th, 2012

chestist soup

(idea submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)  

We got this from one of you a couple of months back and have had it in our inbox since because we think it's a really good idea ~ we just couldn't figure out what to do.  Then, lo and behold, it occurred to us...do what we always do, post it.  Easy right?  So here's an idea and a story-starter from one of you for the rest of us:

i think it would be really cool to do a mother/daughter thing on OOC, maybe ask people to submit something that they wish they could tell their mom or wish they could tell their daughter

Just in time for next year's mother's day, or maybe perfectly timed for today...whether for your mother, your daughter, whomever, share that one thing in the comments.  Remember, if you share your story maybe you'll help change hers.

And always let us know if you have any ideas about things and stories you'd like to see here @OOC.  We promise to move faster next time.