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Love & SexMy BF’s Porn

22 comments | August 12th, 2012

concerned

(by Katie, a 25yo Chestist)

There's so much about this story sent us by one of you we think is important, let's just let her do the talking:

I don't know if I'm upset right now. Or even if I should be.

I hopped on the BF's laptop to check email this morning (his was on and I was lazy enough to not want to turn mine on) and saw he had some... ahem... visual aids... up in the tabs. Now, we have frequently used porn of various kinds as foreplay ("Do you like this? Why? Why not?") so me checking out what was selected has positive precedent with us.

But these were all "Barely Legal!" and "All Horny Teens!" sites... Not the usual variety pack of mid/latetwenties, obviously adult bodies. Im willing to enjoy the blanket assumption that all of these girls are fully legal and do this to support their own, noncoerced sexuality, but all I can see is the girls in the teen Girl Scout troop I volunteered with last year. I texted him to ask about it (nicely, I swear) and he called not ...

Happy HatingI Shouldn’t Have Said Those Things

4 comments | July 2nd, 2012

Screen Shot 2012-07-02 at 8.15.06 AM

(story submitted by Arrested Development, a 28 yo Chestist)

(image by Carl James Ferraro)

Really, how old am I?  The answer is 28 but based on how I handled myself the other night it'd be reasonable to think 14.

I was having a fight with my boyfriend for the too-many-th time.  We've both known this relationshio was over, just neither of us wanted to end it going into summer.  You're practically supposed to be dating someone in summer.  Making out on the beach, having sex in the pool, spending warm nights outside, all that stuff.  Like 2 Ostriches, we both have just stuck our heads in the sand and kept going.

Then I just snapped.  All the things he'd been doing that have annoyed me for so long just piled up and the camel's back broke.  Rather than handle it like an adult, I found myself name-calling, insulting, and not being very nice at all.  At all. 

Maybe I was angrier than I thought, even thenm I don't think that's an excuse for telling him he's a bad lover (he ...

Love & SexWonder If He Ever Thinks Of Me

6 comments | June 19th, 2012

Alone

(story submitted by Kelly, a Chestist)

Every now and again I think about him.  I wonder where he is and what he's made of his life since we said goodbye.

I wonder if he has someone in his life and if she makes him happy.  I wonder if he ever thinks of me.

Saying goodbye wasn't easy even if it was right.  Learning that love isn't always enough wasn't easy either even if it is true.  {end story}

Ever find yourself in a relationship where love just wasn't enough?  How'd you deal with it (or haven't you?)

#lifestagesForcing Myself to Be Single

4 comments | June 17th, 2012

goldfish

(story submitted anonymously, by a chestist)

I've almost always had a boyfriend since I was 12.  From my first kiss to last night, I've never been "single" for more than a few weeks.  I'm no closer to marrying my current boyfriend than I was 12 year-old Rudy.  I've had 2 relationships that lasted for more than year, and one that went fpr almost 3 years.  Most only last a few months.  As soon as one ends I start dating and as soon as I start dating I always get serious.  

I worry sometimes that I'm afraid to be alone and that I should learn how to be.  I'm dating a nice-enough guy now but I know there's nothing long, long term in it.  I think about breaking up with him and forcing myself to be single for a while. It's got to be good for me. {end story}|

You think it'd be good for the writer to spend some time "alone"?  Why (or why not)? 

Love & SexEmotionally Abused

5 comments | June 11th, 2012

chestist sad

(story submitted anonymously, by a 31 yo Chestist)

When i realized that he had been emotionally abusing me, i called him on it. i told him it had to stop or i'd leave. he did stop, and sometimes i wish i'd left anyway. i don't think i'll ever be able to move on or trust him again.  {end story}

Can you have a healthy and happy relationship without trust?  If trust is lost...can you find it?

Happy HatingI Can’t Quit You

4 comments | May 28th, 2012

yellow sun rays

(story submitted by SFG, a 24 yo Chestist)

We were in college when we started dating.  I'd had a few boyfriends in HS, but nothing really serious before him.  I think he taught me how to be in love.

Now it's 2 years after we graduated and we're still together, I'm just not sure we should be.  I tried breaking things off once a year ago and it just didn't work.  I think he tried once too but I'm not really sure.

I can't tell if we're supposed to be together or just too scared not to be.  {end story}

You ever been in a relationship, could've been romantic or even professional, where the fear of not being together is what kept you from leaving?

Love & SexFallen Into Routines

3 comments | May 6th, 2012

Mic

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

I've been dating him since college.  It's been 6 years.  i love him, but I'm not in-love with him anymore.  I'm not even sure he's in-love with me anymore.

We've fallen into routines that maybe I'd find comforting if we'd been married for 20 years.  I'm only 25 though and I don't want routines.   I want excitement and passion and mad, crazy, lust.  The truth is I don't know if we've ever had that though, and I don't know how to get out of this or even if I should try to.

He's sweet, nice and successful.  I know he loves me and I can trust him.  What if he's the best I can find?  That would be so depressing.  I think. {end story}

We have a rule here @OOC HQ that you compromise is fine but you should never settle.  Have you ever had to choose between compromising and settling...in love, work, with friends? 

Love & SexConfidence Wrecker

9 comments | May 5th, 2012

danger

(submitted anonymously by a Chestist, an OOC rewiind)

"Why does he still need to constantly talk to his ex?  He claims they're trying to be friends but why would you WANT to be friends with a girl that cheated on you? What does she have that I don't?  I'm always afraid he'll go back to her even though I did nothing wrong.  It's such a confidence wrecker and ruins my entire day." {end story}

Can you relate?  Any advice?  You think a relationship like this is heart-ache waiting to happen?

 

 

Love & SexMy Heart Aches

10 comments | April 25th, 2012

kiss

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

I broke up with him for all the wrong reasons.  It's only now that I realize it but he's moved on.  My heart aches without him.  My heart aches for him. {end story}

There's little that can so fully and completely hate on your happy like heart ache.  Most of us have been through it.  What's your story?

Love & SexI Had Sex With Your Cousin.

5 comments | April 16th, 2012

Chestist typewriter 2

(story submitted by RES, a 19 yo Chestist)

Sometimes our past can intrude on our present.  Here's her story:

The guy I've been dating wants to make it official and is getting upset that I keep putting my decision off. I really do want to be with him because he's great, but before I ever knew he existed on the planet I slept with his cousin (two night stand, two years ago)...I don't want to bring it up, but I also do want him to just magically find out 2nd hand. I don't know what to do. {end story}

Here at OOC HQ, we don't think RES has anything to be uncomfortable with, and that she should say something because a lie of omission is a lie nonetheless.  But some people react strangely to things like who else we've slept with.  What do you think she should do?

Love & SexOn Becoming a Nun

4 comments | April 11th, 2012

kiss

(story submitted by JS, a 28 year-old Chestist)

You know that line "if I didn't have bad luck I wouldn't have no luck at all"?  That's how I feel about my dating life.  If I didn't have bad dates, I'd have no dates at all.

I was in a 2+ year relationship until last May.  Since then I've had what seems like dozens of first dates and maybe 3 second dates.  It sounds so obvious to say there are no good guys in L.A. and it makes me despise myself a little bit that I've become another woman who complains about not being able to find a guy.  Why do I need to find a guy?  A guy will be lucky to find me!  I don't even know if it's a guy I want as much as to not have to look for one anymore.

A lot of my friends are already married and some are starting to have kids.  Sometimes I wind up feeling like I'm competing in a game of musical chairs with the girls I go out with.  I'm tired of looking.  I'm tired of bad dates.  I'm ...

Love & SexSuspicious Minds

4 comments | March 27th, 2012

green eyed

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

Jealousy and suspicion can be quite the happiness haters, don't you think?  We got this story from one of you:

So, I brought a new friend, who happens to be single, over to hang out with me and my friends. I had my boyfriend with me, as he always is, and she was talking about meeting his friend who's also single.

So we hung out all day and all night, and the next day I had to go to work. But in the morning, when I was supposed to take her home, my boyfriend insisted on doing it, and I felt very uneasy about it. Why do I feel so insecure about letting him run a friend home? I've never felt like that before, but then again, he's never tried to be alone with any of my friends before. Should I confront him? Should I even ask? I don't know what could ease my mind. {end story}

What do you think - should she ask?  How would you react in the same situation?  You think she's making a mountain out of a ...

Love & SexFalling In Love

15 comments | March 16th, 2012

cloudy talk burst

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist, an OOC repeat)

Falling in love is the most easy and most amazing feeling in the world.

Falling out of love is the hardest and most painful.

What is love though? You can't see it, you can't touch it or smell it or hear it or any other senses. You can only feel it. Bond with it. Understand it. But to fall correctly and to fall greatly are two completely different things. But only when you fall utterly and irreplacably in love is when you have it right. But how do you know? You don't. There is no signs that say I'm the one. No messages in a bottle showing up at your doorstep giving you the secret to love, life, and laughter.

With that said, I have always had difficulty telling the difference between crushes and love. I always thought falling in and out of love was the hardest experience that affection and attraction gives to you. I was wrong. The absolute worst is when you're completely unsure. When you fall head over heels for someone only to realize you may also ...

Love & SexScared to Leave

16 comments | March 13th, 2012

chestist sad

(story submitted anonymously, by a 22 year-old Chestist)

We couldn't help but think of that Jack Nicholson line "you can't handle the truth."  Sometimes the truth is hard to handle.  Here's hers:

My story: I think my relationship is over and I'm too scared to leave. [end story.]

12 words, and a whole big story.  Ever been in her shoes, Chestists?  Knowing or at least being pretty sure something's over...a relationship, a friendship, a job...but being too scared to leave because of what may or may not be on the other side?  What was it?  What'd you do?  Sounds like sister could use some advice, so please, share...

#lifestagesBeing a Teenage Girl Sucks

7 comments | February 16th, 2012

party girl

(story submitted anonymously, by a teenaged Chestist)

Are you a teen, been a teen, raising a teen?  If you are, have been, or might be...you'll get this, and her story:

Being a teenager sucks bad. Being a teenage girl sucks even more.

Okay, so I like this guy... a lot. I catch myself glancing at him every 10 minutes at least in school, which is really embarassing because I'm sure someone has noticed. I can't talk to him at all. I'm an extremely shy person, except when I'm with my friends. We have a really small school so we are in pretty much all our classes together. Almost everytime he's near me and I'm with my friends, I try to show off, which is absolutely ridiculous. I actually find myself thinking about what I can say and do to catch his attention. I end up making a huge fool of myself.

I never used to act like this around anyone before. The problem is, I can't seem to stop acting like a crazy person when I'm around him. It's realllly bad, or at least I see it that way. ...

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