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A Woman Should…

19 comments | August 29th, 2012

women

(Submitted by Shelby, a 22 yo Chestist)

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... > enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... > a youth she's content to leave behind.... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age.... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... > one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... > a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... > eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her ...

What I’d Tell Her

4 comments | August 26th, 2012

chestist swirl2

(by anonymous)

This is what i would tell her if i could...

I wasn't trying to hurt you this was just what i was feeling, and i thought you should know since this is your new life. You really hurt me on a personal level, and i hate how you can always do that but i can't.

Nope i just can't do that to my best friend, I can't tell you that you're terrified of not having an image and hate the thought of not having a man in your life. No i can't tell you that you are basically the product everybody else's ideas. I would never tell you that because i would never want to hurt you i always circle those thoughts, but would never say them because i love you and i don't want you to have another "call for help".

I am someone. you really pissed me off yesterday but most of all you hurt me so fucking much I hate you for that right now. I've put more into this friendship then you ever have, and you don't even give a ...

FU Thomas

2 comments | August 19th, 2012

boom

(by Elle, 19)

There are times when I want to tell Ol' Thomas the Tank Engine that he can take his "I think I can, I know I can" attitude and shove it.  FU Thomas, you try living my life.

I am tired and frustrated and trying to balance too many things between classes, working, and trying to have a social life.  I feel like I keep chugging up hill and and no matter how mamy times I say to myself "I think I can" something always falls through the cracks.

Why can't I win the lottery or something?  Then I wouldn't have to work and I could just focus on school and boys.  Isn't that what people my age are supposed to do, anyway?  {end story}

While we can't abide anger at Thomas, who are we to judge?  What we can relate to is feeling like the climb is long and steep and that you may need more stamina than you think you have.  You climbing any hills that seem steeper than you can imagine being able to get to the top of?

Schadenfreude

4 comments | August 16th, 2012

mean girls

(by Christy)

I'm a bad person.  I get jealous of good things happening to others.  The thing is not only do I want those good things myself -- I don't want them to happen for them. What's wrong with me? {end story}

Ah, schadenfreude.  You ever take pleasure in the misery or bad luck of others?  Why's that?

Happy HatingI Miss Optimism

1 response | August 15th, 2012

chestist blue

(by MCC, 29 yo)

There was a time when I had certainty everything would always be ok.  You know, that sense that no matter what happened it all happened for good reasons and that everything would be as it should and that that - that would be great.

Then bad things started happening. My mom got sick, the guy I was sure I was going to marry got a job and nmoved away and we couldn't manage the long-distance and longer abscences.  A career that was going great stopped being so great.  I keep looking for the lessons and I don't see any.

It all makes me more cynical and less hopeful.  More confused and less certain that everything is going to work out.  I miss optimism. {end story}

You ever feel like you're on the wrong side of Karma?  What do you do to get back to the other side?

#chestismsMaking Mistakes

6 comments | August 14th, 2012

yellow sun rays

(by KSE, a Chestist)

Live, learn, screw up, get better.  Here's her story:

I make so many mistakes.  At work, and with my family and friends.  I do the wrong thing and sometimes I do the right thing in the wrong way.  Sometimes I say the wrong thing even though I mean to say the right thing.

I carry my umbrella on days when it doesn't rain, and sometimes I don't carry it on days when it does.  I take wrong turns, and sometimes choose the wrong things at restaurants.  I give people breaks who don't deserve them and sometimes don't give breaks to people who do.

I can be short-tempered and quick-fused.  I can trust blindly when I shouldn't.  Sometimes I sleep with guys I wish I hadn't.

I can hold on to some things too long and other things and people not long enough.  I buy things that I don't always like when I get them home.  I've taken the easy way out when I should have done the right thing even if it was the harder thing. I've made a lot of mistakes.

I've learned to appreciate my mistakes even ...

Not Proud.

5 comments | August 12th, 2012

chestist threads

(by anonymous)

I am constantly berating myself for not doing better things with my free time. Instead of exercising, doing something productive, taking some of the household jobs off of my husband's back, etc, I hang out at the cafe with friends, read books etc. I don't have the willpower to get myself to do what I should. I should get a job and have a boss. It's all the more unacceptable because on the outside I have a completely perfect life- I'm in decent shape (could lose 10 lbs but definitely not fat), 4 kids who are healthy and do well at school (although I'm always on them to do better), a husband who makes a ton of money, a lovely house in the city and a summer house on the beach, enough money to do basically anything I want. And a ph.d in an area I am good at. Why can't I either enjoy myself or get motivated to do something so that I am proud of myself! {end story}

Love & SexMy BF’s Porn

22 comments | August 12th, 2012

concerned

(by Katie, a 25yo Chestist)

There's so much about this story sent us by one of you we think is important, let's just let her do the talking:

I don't know if I'm upset right now. Or even if I should be.

I hopped on the BF's laptop to check email this morning (his was on and I was lazy enough to not want to turn mine on) and saw he had some... ahem... visual aids... up in the tabs. Now, we have frequently used porn of various kinds as foreplay ("Do you like this? Why? Why not?") so me checking out what was selected has positive precedent with us.

But these were all "Barely Legal!" and "All Horny Teens!" sites... Not the usual variety pack of mid/latetwenties, obviously adult bodies. Im willing to enjoy the blanket assumption that all of these girls are fully legal and do this to support their own, noncoerced sexuality, but all I can see is the girls in the teen Girl Scout troop I volunteered with last year. I texted him to ask about it (nicely, I swear) and he called not ...

#bodiesBattery Operated

10 comments | August 8th, 2012

exploding flowers

(by anonymous)

I'm 28 and have orgasms by myself, but having them during sex seems very difficult for me.

I've been having sex for a good 13 years and the big O only comes with the help of a battery operated device. {end story}

There's no doubt orgasms make us feel more better (yup, you can quote us on that).  So a quick poll...you and orgasms a) always b) never c) sometimes d) only with a vibrator e) only by ____ (fill in the blank).  Remember, you can always comment anonymously at Feel More Better.

(note" this story came in as a comment on this one.)

 

 

Love & SexA New Relationship

8 comments | August 5th, 2012

kiss

(by anonymous, 20)

My whole life I've been a confident and independent girl. I crave deep connection (and luckily find it frequently as I am from a huge and fabulous family), but I have crippling fears of vulnerability.

I'm happy to be dating a man who is my first real relationship. Navigating these new waters of being in a serious relationship is fun but so terrifying. I feel naked half of the time, hiding the other half. Is that normal?

I keep thinking "what's the point?" of getting in so deep with this guy when we are both so young, it will probably only end in heartbreak. It's horrible to not be able to just be present and enjoy where I am right now, but that question eats at me. I just assume that my bf and I will eventually break up, and sometimes I think I self-sabotage and try to expedite the process. I thought I would feel better when he said "I love you," but this feeling won't go away.

Does this mean I'm not in love? I was certain I was until he ...

#bodiesWoot!

8 comments | August 3rd, 2012

exploding flowers

(story submitted by E, a 32 yo Chestist)

Oh, hello:

I had my first orgasm ever last night!  I'm 32!  I was alone!  I may never leave the house again!  {end story}

Is it easier for you to orgasm with or without a partner (if at all)? P.S. yay for E.

Bad Fathers

11 comments | July 29th, 2012

chestist black scratch

(by Natasha, 19, a Chestist)

My dad gives me crap about my weight and how unpretty I am all the time. For the record, I am 5'2'', 103 lbs (naturally, no eating disorders here), and have been called "stunningly beautiful" and "fairy-like" by my mom's friends. In a month, I'm heading off to college in New York and my dad keeps teasing me in front of the entire family. He says I'm going to come back 50 lbs heavier and looking like a whale, and that it's simply a fact. I also mentioned that a friend of mine auditioned to play a Disney Princess. His response? "She looks more like Ursula." This is one of my best friends. He keeps saying that she's "chunky" and needs to get a nose job. At the same time, he blatantly tells me that he thinks my tall, beautiful, stick-thin friend is one of the sexiest people he has ever met. This kinda language lead to my younger sister's anorexia earlier this year. I've tried talking to him about it, but he won't stop. I'm terrified that he ...

#thecumulativeeffectHannah Montana on Body Image

4 comments | July 29th, 2012

concerned

 (by Abbie, a 17 yo Chestist)

"Nobody's perfect." - Hannah Montana

 

Nobody (no body) is perfect...that's a radical thought. You may "know" it already, but do you really KNOW it? And if not, it's time to ask yourself the following: In what universe does Hannah Montana know something I don't??? {end story}

 

 

Surviving Abuse

5 comments | July 23rd, 2012

black explosion chestist

(by Confused, a  Chestist)

I was in an abusive relationship for four years and it's taken me another four to deal with it after all the denial. I've been with my partner for almost three years and he really helped me come to terms with what happened.

It's been a relief to deal with it, but now I feel like I can't mention it to him, or else it means I'm not over it. I'm having a really hard time setting sexual boundaries with him because of it and some innocent things will make me feel terrible - but I can't tell him. This is just so stupid. How do I say I'm over it while still asserting myself as a survivor??? {end story}

 

#bodiesOut of Control

9 comments | July 23rd, 2012

Sketch 2011-01-20 18_34_52(3)

(by Anonymous, a Chestist)

You ever make one decision only to worry that the decision you made has consequences you hadn't necessarily considered to start?  She has and here's her story:

"Don’t even get me started on fears concerning my ability to conceive! I was on the pill for 11 years straight before finally deciding to stop opening that little pink pack on a daily basis, and I’ ve read one too many articles about the effects of birth control on one's body. I’ m not ready to have a kid yet, but I worry all the time about whether or not I will be able to do it when I am."  {end story}

Control's a funny thing.  Sometimes we think we have it only to find out maybe we don't have quite as much as we'd thought - or hoped. Are there things-which-you-cannot-control that are stressing you out?  Why?  #discuss.

 

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