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WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND?

EVERY TIME!?! (Rated R)

21 comments | March 9th, 2012

(submitted anonymously by a Chestist.  Posted 5.20.11 and again now)

This reader is getting if off her chest, though it sounds like that  may be the only place she's getting it off.  Her (very short) story is rated R.  We have a feeling she's not alone.  Is she?

"Do I have to show him where my clit is EVERY TIME??? " [end of story.]

What frustrates you in bed (or on the floor or…)  if he (or she) doesn't get where you want them to go, are you comfortable speaking your truth and showing them the way?

Remember, you can always comment anonymously.

 

21 comments

  • Not Alone

    Posted on May 20, 2011

    The only guy I didn’t need a map for was so annoying when we weren’t in bed, I just couldn’t bear to be with him anymore. Life can be so unfair:)

    Report this comment

    • OOC

      Posted on May 20, 2011

      Laughing with you. And then crying a little bit too:)

      What do you think it is…why’s it so hard to figure out? Thanks for sharing, Not Alone.

      Report this comment

  • Valerie

    Posted on May 20, 2011

    I really wish I couldn’t relate to this. But I can.

    Report this comment

  • Anonymous

    Posted on May 20, 2011

    Same guy? Every time? A lot of times? That is no good. Sorry, sister.

    Report this comment

  • OOC

    Posted on May 20, 2011

    You’ve got speak your truth and work for your happy, miss. nothing to be embarrassed about. Pursuit of happiness and all. Go get it. XO, OOC

    Report this comment

  • LOL

    Posted on May 20, 2011

    Laughing with you, not at you. OK, maybe tearing up a little bit too.

    Report this comment

  • BrownandBlue

    Posted on May 20, 2011

    I once thought about getting a treasure map tattooed on my belly. Too forward you think?

    Report this comment

  • Katie

    Posted on May 21, 2011

    Odds that a guy will know how to get their on his own? 50/50.

    Report this comment

  • CuriousKitty

    Posted on November 15, 2011

    I get this. Especially since it takes so much clitoral stimulation for me to orgasm. I keep a medical diagram of genitalia handy (seriously. have the page marked in a random medical book I have) and showed my boyfriend where the clit is then basically told him how to best get me off. Lucky for me, he was a fast learner 😉

    Sadly, he’s the only boyfriend that has thought to take my pleasure into account. My previous one was the reason I got the medical book at a garage sale my neighbor was having and he STILL never learned.

    Report this comment

  • thefahrm

    Posted on November 29, 2011

    I am going to assume that most who have commented are female, and compared to me (69), relatively young. I am surprised you have had partners that are ignorant of female anatomy and sexuality. Most of your partners appear to believe that your satisfaction as well as theirs is your responsibility. What fools!
    I was one too, many years ago. I learned that if I could satisfy my partner, give her the best, most intense sexual experience, I pretty much was always satisfied myself. That is, most of my partners have appreciated my dedication to their pleasure and have responded in kind. I always wanted and want my partners to remember how great we were/are together, even decades later. I don’t understand why many men just don’t get it with respect to understanding and pleasing their partner; I thought younger guys were so much more sensitive than my generation.

    Report this comment

    • Sueann

      Posted on March 11, 2012

      Yes, younger guys are more sensitive. The problem is it’s to themselves and not others. Sir, you should give free lectures! If you were on my subway handing out fliers I’d help you.

      xoxo

      Report this comment

  • Anonymous

    Posted on March 10, 2012

    If your partner doesn’t know what they’re doing SHOW THEM THE WAY. Don’t you think they want to know what you want? Why bother with all the mess otherwise? Vicki

    Report this comment

    • RTK

      Posted on March 10, 2012

      I never want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Finding a guy who knows what he’s doing and likes doing it, is not easy.

      Report this comment

    • Anonymous

      Posted on March 11, 2012

      How many times should you show them the way? What you like? And when should you just give up? I have this problem after 10 years of marraige. He’s a great guy in all respects but one. :(

      Report this comment

      • OffOurChests

        Posted on March 11, 2012

        Never give up, Anonymous…because if you do, what have you got?

        Have you been clear, open, and direct about what you want and need? Even after 10 years it can be hard, but what have you got to lose?

        Report this comment

  • Anonymous

    Posted on March 12, 2012

    I have a Guy that’s totally into pleasing me.and he’s relatively good at it….but there’s something wrong with me that makes it take foreverrr. So I usually fake it to speed things up. I feel awful but I feel worse that he has to work so hard.

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    • Anonymous

      Posted on April 3, 2012

      Oh there is nothing wrong with you. Most women actually take an average of 20 min to come, as opposed to men who can just pop on cue. I don’t think enough of us vocalize the fact that it takes us a while, but it does. and it’s normal.
      That’s the problem with us women though, we’re so into pleasing our partners that we make it all about them in bed and give up on ourselves. It’s a two way street, we gotta learn that we deserve the pleasure just as much and teach the men that it takes us longer than them so they need to be prepared and willing because its a give and take.

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      • OOC

        Posted on April 3, 2012

        Thanks, Anonymous. You speak the truth (but you knew that).

        As a generalization, why do you think women are like this – and men aren’t? Interesting…

        Thanks for joining the conversation, XO, OOC

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