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Putting My Kids Through a Wall

7 comments | May 6th, 2012

(story submitted by J, a Chestist)

I really love my kids.  There are times when I just want to put them through a wall.  Not to cause them misery or pain mind you, but to put them out of mine.  In case anyone's worrying, I really won't do it.  I just want to. 

It's just there are moments when for no reason at all, or lots of reasons altogether, I can't help but thinking that the one instant of release would be like an immediate full-body massage, total relief.  Kind of like my body screaming S-T-F-U for one minute WON'T YOU, PLEASE.

Then, of course, I feel guilty and sad, and my guilt and sadness pushes my frustration to the side and I hug and kiss them and tell them how much I love them.  {end story}

Probably not a lot of parents that can't relate to this story somehow.  Regardless of whether or not you have kids, has your frustration ever reached a point where you did something you really wish you hadn't done?  Remember, you can always share anonymously.  Go on and get it off your chest.

7 comments

  • Dee

    Posted on May 7, 2012

    I don’t have kids yet.
    But I sure have felt this way with other people’s kids.
    And my siblings. And my parents.
    And sometimes strangers on the street, rude people on the train and any adult who likes to try and take their misery out on others.

    You know what helps me? Laughing. I just laugh. Or sing to myself in my head, try a quick mediation by observing my feelings and releasing them. Anything to get me out of that funky mental space. I don’t like it there.

    Or better yet- think about who will have to fix the wall (and if it’s your significant other think about who will have to listen to them bitch about fixing the wall)lol

    Just laugh. Make yourself a cocktail and laugh it out. Your kids will likely join in which should make those hugs and kisses even better for the both of you.

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    • Sallie

      Posted on May 7, 2012

      What is it about other people’s kids that can make me so crazy? They’re the best contraceptive device ever made. Except for my niece, she’s the best.

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  • OMG

    Posted on May 7, 2012

    OMG, I can’t count the # of times I’ve wanted to do this. Fortunately, the number of times I’ve actually done it remains at none. I get it though. Oh do I get it.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted on May 7, 2012

    I have never told anyone this or said it out loud. I “beat” my dog when I was in college. He’d made me so mad that I kicked out at him once he made me so mad crapping in the house — which he never did — that I picked him up and tossed him. THANK GOD neither time did he get hurt but he definitely got scared. It makes my stomach ache now even thinking about it. What kind of a person is cruel to a dog? He was also the sweetest dog ever. I have not thought about this in years and now it makes me wonder if I can handle having kids.

    I had to put my sweet dog to sleep years ago. I am still so sorry I did that.

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  • JungleQueen

    Posted on May 7, 2012

    I have destroyed a lot of things in my frustration/anger/rage. Thankfully I have come a very long way, and my destructive rampages have met a calm. I just pray that I can keep some sort of composure. I have a 4 year old and 3 year old twins, all boys, so something is always being broken, stained, or destroyed beyond repair.Then toss in frustration with your spouse capability to do the very least possible, and 2 dogs… one in particular who’s still young and eats everything… including a light bulb I didn’t even know we had! Anonymous poster above me(or below?), my dog pee’d on the floor right after I finished sweeping and mopping… just squat RIGHT in front of me and let it loose. I went into major rage mode and punched her. I know that it so incredibly awful, and I still can’t believe I did it… no excuses for that sort of action but when I did my older dog bit me. So, I got what I deserved. I think it’s just realizing when we get to this point. It’s a daily struggle for me to not lose it, but it’s getting easier. I just really made myself sound like an awful person = /

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    • Rachel

      Posted on May 7, 2012

      We all have our breaking points, and I appreciate your honesty. Of course I don’t condone people hitting dogs, but it sounds like you have a lot to deal with. Any way you can lessen your burden? Me, I’d ditch the dogs. Easier than getting rid of the kids. :)

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  • Momof2

    Posted on May 7, 2012

    When my kids were both under 2 life around here was pretty challenging. I felt like such a failure, I was exhausted, and I really didn’t think I would make it through to the other side. I began to understand why those women drove cars into bodies of water. I never did it, but I understood. I became much less judgmental during those years. That was definitely a plus.

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