Stop Comparing Yourself

2 comments | January 30th, 2012

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

It seems to be an unforunate part of the human condition that we compare ourselves to others – sometimes to make oursleves feel better, but often to make oursleves feel less than and worse.  Buzzkill.  Here's one younger reader's story – and advice:

We're always comparing ourselves with others. I don't know why we girls do this, maybe it's just the way it is. We never really believe it when people say were pretty or smart or something. When my friends or other girls complain about how fat they are I look at them and I look at me. A lot of times they're skinnier than me and I think – wow if they're fat then what am I? There is the first step of self conciousness.

Then when others bag on how ugly they are I look again and compare and think – well they're prettier than me so what am I? Everytime someone says something bad about themselves I ask myself if they're better or worse than me.  Eventually you stop believing what good things others say about you and what you used to think about yourself and it's like you're spending your life trying to be someone you're not.

And all of a sudden your face changes in the mirror and it's like what's wrong with me. If we could stop trashing ourselves and stop comparing ourselves to each other and the people in magazines maybe we'd all be okay. I mean there are bound to be people out there that are prettier or skinnier or something more than you in their certain way. But ultimately that doesn't mean that you're not pretty or skinny too. Sometimes I think it all comes down to you and how you choose to express yourself. {end story}

When do you see yourself comparing you to her or him or them?  Body, beauty, clothes, money, relationships…???  You ever find it makes you feel better about you – and if it does, does it endure – or does it usually leave you feeling flat and all, what's wrong with me?  Let's not worry about keeping up with the Joneses, let's just get it off our chests and see if we fcan't feel more better.  Whaddaya say?


  • Tina T

    Posted on January 30, 2012

    Even at 37, I catch myself comparing where I am, what I look like, how much I make, how happy my marriage is, how smart and good-looking my kids are. I wish I knew why I did it so I could stop doing it. It never makes me feel better except for a second, like a sugar-buzz.

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  • B.E.L.

    Posted on January 30, 2012

    All my friends are married or getting married. A lot of them have kids already. I am 29 and have no man in my life, am struggling with work and have no idea what I am doing. Comparing myself to others takes up most of my day.

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