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Why Can’t Women Sleep Around?

51 comments | March 13th, 2012

(story submitted by KSE, a Chestist)

This writer's wondering why her BF has a problem with the number of guys she's been with.  Here's her story:

I've been with a lot of guys.  Not hundreds but a lot.  I like sex and I like men and I like having sex with men.  I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years.  He hasn't slept with that many women and I think it freaks him out that I've had so much more sex and so many more partners than he has.  Isn't that so sexist of him?  His being all freaked out about my past make me wonder if we can have a future. If the situations were reversed, and he'd had slept with a lot more people than me, he wouldn't think twice and wouldn't expect me to either.  It's 2012.  Why can't women sleep around and have it be as much of a no-biggie as when guys do? 

We agree @OOC HQ agree…there's still this cultural double standard about women and sex that doesn't exist for men.  You agree or disagree?  Why do you think the double standard still exists If you think it does, of course).  Sex and the modern girl…have at it.

51 comments

  • K.

    Posted on March 13, 2012

    Who says women can’t sleep around?! I have been for years :)

    Report this comment

  • Anonymous

    Posted on March 13, 2012

    There’s still a clear and distinct separation in what’s considered appropriate sexual behavior for men and women.

    In my opinion, a lot of it toes back to the “boys will be boys” thinking of so many people (sometimes me included). It just perpetuates behavioral stereotypes.

    Report this comment

    • OOC

      Posted on March 13, 2012

      Thanks, Anonymous…you think there will ever be a time when “girls will get to “be boys” too in this context?

      Report this comment

      • Handsome as ****

        Posted on October 6, 2015

        This reminds me of the handsome man syndrome. He is handsome so life is much easier for him, but yet fools himself to think that life is harder cause he’s not use to trying.

        Report this comment

  • Stef

    Posted on March 13, 2012

    I think you should lose this dude. He’s judging you for doing what you want to do. How’s that a good relationship? Sorry. I do not mean to be insensitive.

    Report this comment

  • Michelle T.

    Posted on March 13, 2012

    I can count my “lovers” on my fingers (and one foot, maybe :)) My BFF is like Samantha from Sex and the City. Her life has been one one night stand to another. Sometimes she says she wants to settle down, and find the “one”. She loves her career too much. I found my “one” and as happy as I am about that, there are times when I wish I had the experiences she has.

    Report this comment

    • OOC

      Posted on March 15, 2012

      What experiences do you think maybe your missing, Michelle? Specifics or more about just getting to know different people in different ways?

      Report this comment

  • Aimee

    Posted on March 13, 2012

    Well, it used to be that we were called sluts if we slept around. Now we get called sluts (on national radio, no less!) if we don’t sleep around and need birth control for medical reasons. Either way there are some people that want to label women that way.

    I don’t think any modern man should have a problem with this. As long as you’re not sleeping around on him, what’s the big deal?

    Report this comment

  • Nicole

    Posted on March 13, 2012

    when i was younger – college and mid-twenties – i did sleep around and made no excuses for it. i can’t stand the double standard – men are glorified for sleeping around and women are whores for it. just another societal “rule” that has been pounded into our culture for years and years and needs to end……

    Report this comment

  • Emmie

    Posted on March 13, 2012

    The double standard sucks, I’ve encountered it funnily enough not with my boyfriend or ex husband but with my guy friends. They can and do bring up their sex lives but if I say anything about mine they get all “lalala I can’t hear you” which depending o my mood I find amusing or annoying. All that to say I feel your pain.

    Report this comment

    • UoM Blog

      Posted on April 28, 2013

      It’s not a double standard. Women and men are biologically different.
      ou hear it all the time from people who are getting shafted by reality. “It’s so UNFAIR that guys get to do X with impunity while girls doing X suffer social stigma.” They think by bitching like this and attempting to shame those who would live in harmony with double standards they can alter people’s behavior into something more to their liking (i.e., a non-status driven, non-materialistic, non-craven utopia of perfect loving LTRs where no one is left out and no one gets dumped and everyone has a soulmate and enough positive life-affirming experiences to share with their yenta friends in recipe-swapping blogs devoted to covering the fascinating minutiae of their funny, exciting, sexy, touching, poignant, growth-oriented lives.)

      Then there are those who, when called out on their inconsistencies, deploy a swarm of sophistry intended to obfuscate and deny the existence of double standards because they are beneficiaries of them. Acknowledging these truths would mean coming to terms with the fact that they, like everyone else, have at their core an animal nature.

      Fuck that noize. The truth of the matter is that double standards are necessary if you want to be halfway competent in your dealings with men and women. As the author of “Looking Out for #1″ and “Winning Through Intimidation” wrote:

      If you deny reality it will automatically work against you.*

      Double standards are fixed features of life as a sexually reproducing social organism. The modern career woman is miserable because she is constantly locking horns with men who won’t value her for her career achievement as much as for her hourglass figure and bedroom skills, while these same men admire and respect career dominance by other men. Her refusal to come to grips with this essential double standard explains why so many hard-charging women have turned their backs on their own femininity and lost the art of female coquettishness and submissiveness. Alpha men have responded by fucking and leaving these domineering gender impostors for cute waitresses. Betas have responded in their own way — by assuming the doormat position and giving these feminists *exactly* what they claim they want.

      The same goes for sluts. A man who sleeps with many women gets high fives from his buddies and sexual interest from girls who can’t help their burning loins. But girls who sleep around are socially ostracized, used by men and shunned by women. It has always been and it will always be as long as a woman has 400 eggs to a man’s nearly infinite number of sperm. Parents will treat their sons and daughters differently when dispensing advice on how to deal with the opposite sex and all the harpies with their multiple humanities degrees shrieking equalist platitudes to the high heavens will never change this. It’s one thing to bloviate from a comfy tenured perch while your lesbian lover sucks ben wa balls out of your cooch from under the desk; it’s quite another to entrust the welfare of your children with the twisted lies of the Bitterati.

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  • Meagan

    Posted on March 26, 2012

    I have always been a woman completely against double standards! Even when I was a teenager. I feel we are coming to a point in time where women are learning to rebel against society and its standards. My motto has always been “Who is society to judge me!” Women need sex and satisfaction just as much if not more than men. Theres nothing wrong with wanting casual associations with no strings attatched.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted on August 27, 2012

    Major double standard! All of my female friends who have numbers 20, 30+ have all lied to their partners. Actually I noticed that they only count their ‘serious’ relationships. So my friend who is around 25 has told her bf that he is #6. It annoys me that guys assume that if you have slept with anymore than a handful of men, you’re a ‘slut.’ YET they want confidence in the bedroom… Seriously, have they ever put the two together?

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  • Anonymous

    Posted on September 22, 2012

    Women are more conservative than men with sex and drinking and eating. I can’t Imange why so many are democrats because it goes against all reason and all values that women hold true. Women want a relationship and a companion and freedom and security maybe that’s why they want a government security blanket. Guys should be the ones voting for more food stamps and unemployment for life. this is a man-session and the social fabric is coming off the American dream, its every man or woman for themself yes this will increase sexual behavior, drinking, risky and volugre ways nd will create more women that act like men and more men that depend on our system for support. Don’t you just love liberalism it will erase 3000 years of modern culture and stand all our hopes on end for good.

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  • Dr. Stein

    Posted on November 10, 2012

    There is a simple answer to your question, and it goes back to the very begining. Men are bred to try to reproduce with as many women as possible, to keep the species going. Women, were/are hardwired to look for the “right” man, one who was not only strong, but a could provide and protect the family. We see it all the time with strong leaders and wealthy men doing well with women young and old. We also see this behaviour in the animal kingdom, and we are animals. Women who sleep around are viewed in the subconcious, as something being wrong with them. Right or wrong, we are trying to undo thousands of years of hardwiring in both species, over the past 50 years. It won’t be undone anytime soon, and maybe never. People have become very spoiled over the past few decades. They want all the expierence with none of the consequence. If you like to sleep around, you should look into having an open relationship with someone(swinging), and enjoy someone who is not hung up on what you are all complaining about.

    Report this comment

    • UoM Blog

      Posted on April 28, 2013

      True, women are hypergamous, they seek the highest value male to plant their seed within them and produce offspring where as men are hardwired to spread their seed.

      Report this comment

      • Anonymous

        Posted on July 1, 2013

        Not necessarily. In several species, the most successful females (in terms of biological fitness) were the ones that were able to confuse paternity (i.e. by having children with different men). This is considered a biological benefit for the females, to diversify their offspring.

        Women, like men, have always cheated. And men have raised children that haven’t been theirs.

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    • Anonymous

      Posted on February 21, 2014

      we also see instances of females being extremely promiscuous in the animal kingdom. Dolphins being just one of many examples.

      This is more of a primate issue than an ‘animal’ issue, and even there we have bonobos (with whom, i might add, humans share specific genes that other primates lack) as an exception.

      and you speak as though you find examples of females being perfectly faithful to one male all over the animal kingdom; you do not. It is actually relatively rare. Even more rare is for the male to participate in raising and protecting the offspring.

      even in primate groups that are led by one dominant male, the females do sometimes mate with beta males. There may be a biological imperative for females of certain species to find one male to help care for the offspring they produce, but diversity in the gene pool is also an imperative, and once those offspring are raised there is no guarantee that those females will produce the next batch with the same male. In fact, as in dolphins, mating with several males offers the offspring greater protection. if it might be your kid, but you can’t be sure, you protect it just in case.

      So when you say that women are “hardwired to look for the right man,” and i think it is pretty clear that you mean one specific male with exclusive mating privileges, you are incorrect. Our species may have a greater tendency toward that behavior, but the other comments alone are proof that it is not ‘hardwired’ behavior, but more likely the result of social pressures.

      And rather than it being a female trait to seek one partner, i think it can be shown more accurately to be a male trait to attempt to force a female into giving him exclusive mating privileges, thus ensuring that his genes are carried on and not those of another male. You see this behavior in primates and dolphins, as well as other species.

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      • Handsome as ****

        Posted on October 6, 2015

        Very interesting way to analyze human tendency. It is easy to relate occurring instances in humans and compare that to the natural world. Ie hunger as a means of survival and sex to gene or animalistic reproduction.

        I believe the most concerning obstacle between these comparisons is ethics. A human trait that is far more super intelligent than animals. A trait to deter reason and conclusion and our ability to see right wrong and animalistic behaviors that no other creature on earth posess.

        Knowing that it is right. It is wrong. It is animalistic. Understanding intellectual growth. Maturity. The ability to infinitely grow within or selves. And improve.

        It’s true that sex is very animalistic. It doesn’t mean we have to be animals. So I would have to say. Many sexual partners is wrong. Morally. Intellectually. Gene wise as well.

        But who is to sit on the podium and preach. It is only in our human maturity and self growth that we will all come to agree to this. After experiencing love, divorce, pain, depression, giving a brother a chance, etc. and so on.

        There is no reason for intellectual immorality. Just that… We need to mature and grow.

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  • Alex

    Posted on March 12, 2013

    Who says they can’t? Women can and have numerous times. The difference is, women seem to be attracted to men who have slept around and have experience, while the guy who hasn’t had any experience with sex isn’t really valued by women. Women are a lot like jobs; once you had one, it’s easier to get another one because you have experience — but if you never had one, it’s hard to get job.

    On the other hand, men’s perspective is drastically different than women. Men view women like items. They don’t want shoes that has been worn by many, they want a new pair of Jordan shoes that hasn’t been worn by anyone. It’s the same with women, nobody wants sloppy seconds, best ones are virgins. Women who slept around are less valuable, nobody cares about rented bowling shoes who has been worn by everyone.

    Unfortunately, it is man’s nature, much like trying to change a heterosexual guy to like other men, and forcing a homosexual guy to like women. A man who doesn’t agree with this, probably has a current girlfriend or a wife that had slept around in the past — while deep down, he wishes he would be her first.

    Is it sort of a double standard? Yeah it is, but men and women in our society made it this way. Men are not the only ones who call women sluts, women are just as guilty to label other women as such. In fact, I think they do it more often than men.

    When women lie about sleeping around, it isn’t to protect the guy’s ego, it’s to protect their own value.

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    • Alex

      Posted on March 12, 2013

      Sorry about my awful grammar, didn’t have time to reread over it — plus it’s late.

      Report this comment

    • Anonymous

      Posted on October 9, 2015

      Big quote in the last sentence!
      ” When women lie about sleeping around, it isn’t to protect the guy’s ego, it’s to protect their own value.”

      Report this comment

  • Anonymous

    Posted on April 9, 2013

    women can sleep around – most simply won’t be respected through. why SHOULDN’T women sleep around like guys have? for a couple of reasons:
    1) women are as risk of more things than guys (such as simple complications)
    2) the glaring risk of pregnancy is obviously disproportionate
    3) the respect issue i mentioned earlier

    why aren’t mean looked negatively upon for being promiscuous or have a ton of partners? common sense really. there is literally ZERO challenged to a woman gain a ton of partners. he’s EASY. very easy in fact. so there’s literally nothing to praise. this isn’t the case for men. it’s still kinda shallow, but the fact is that there’s an accomplishment men can feel from this because it’s not nearly so EASY – especially for the “average” guy.

    another way to understand is the saying “a key that can unlock all locks is an amazing, valued key. a lock that can be unlocked by any key (or many keys) is a worthless lock”

    another factor is that men have typically been REQUIRED to have actual bedroom experience… required to have this BY WOMEN. there’s only one way they acquire such experience. you disagree? nonsense – women didn’t state this requirement, their actions proved it (dissatisfaction with the act of sex itself leading up to divorce is common for women, not men).

    the list goes on… men and women aren’t the same nor equal in this regard. they never have been, and never will be, for various reasons. there’s so many ways to prove this that it’s sad.

    remove the idea of it’s modern times so women should have similar numbers of different sexual partners. i can assure you the acceptance you think there is or should be, is an impossibility – generally speaking… and the only thing people try to do is force others to be silent about their distaste of women being so “out there”

    and before trying to be as out there as men, why not hold a better/higher standard for men not to have a ton of partners? the current behavior towards supposed “equality” makes women look incredibly hypocritical for the years and years of chastising men for it, simply because it wasn’t socially acceptable for a woman to be promiscuous. hypocritical and envious. which only makes respect drop that much more.

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    • UoM Blog

      Posted on April 28, 2013

      Exactly, nobody wants to pay full price for heavily used goods. The more partners women go through the more damaged they are, hopping from penis to penis for a woman is a lot more damaging that it is for a man, but eh nowadays we have women commending sleeping around and living the sex and the city lifestyle. They mainly end up marrying down or battling spinsterhood. Nature is a powerful thing, and you’ll always lose if you go against it.

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      • Anonymous

        Posted on July 1, 2013

        I think your use of science is a little sketchy here and driven by an agenda. Evolutionarily, there is nothing inherently “damaging” for females to have a lot of sex with many different partners. Nor is it “damaging” for men. The potential problem came from having a father “father” a child that wasn’t theirs, but it was risk many females were willing to take. Thus nature indicates that it is risky but advantageous for women to deceive males into parenting children that isn’t theirs.

        Women are also in the business of passing on their genes and having successful offspring, which includes diversification.

        That being said, very few scientists or psychologists would ever use evolution or biology as a justification for slut-shaming, cheating, deceiving fathers, or objectifying women based on sexual histories, etc. At the end of the day, women are not objects whose value or price is tied to their sexual histories or number of partners. I think a woman could be both respectable and have multiple partners and not be considered “damaged.”

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        • Handsome as ****

          Posted on October 6, 2015

          Sleeping around is immoral. It doesn’t matter how much bad data supports it. We are tomorrow’s future. We need good data that supports intellectual futures.

          Hence the silent broken hoe. Overly loud childish lady. Men that sway crowds to agree with whoring.

          Hence it be called cheating. Slut. Man that follows his penis.

          All damaging conclusions. Immoral.

          When I look at my future in America, I Currently see these conclusions.

          1. Maybe finding a woman that can be my equal. Scratching my head at 35. 2. Letting my childish babied women friends believe that they should be babies and maybe this is just how it is. Looking at taxes, finances, and having that save my *** from a broken America. 3. The path of a lonely man. 4. Becoming a slut whore man and praying for no std.

          Listening to the laughter of children at the playground. Hearing about their dreams. Seeing them grow and become successful. our conclusions should only be geared towards happiness.

          Cause we are not animals. We need to be moral. For the sake of us all.

          Report this comment

    • Anonymous

      Posted on February 21, 2014

      in point 1 i assume you mean complications with pregnancy, making it essentially the same as point two. I would like to point out that pregnancy, and it’s possible complications, are a risk in monogamous relationships as well, making this more of an argument against sex than against having multiple partners. As to point 3, that is what we’re saying is ridiculous. a woman should not lose respect because she, like any sexually reproducing organism, enjoys sex.

      If women weren’t looked down upon for being promiscuous it might not be such a challenge for men to find sexual partners.

      “another way to understand is the saying “a key that can unlock all locks is an amazing, valued key. a lock that can be unlocked by any key (or many keys) is a worthless lock” I’ve heard this silly argument before. Why is the woman the lock and the man the key? because the guys junk goes into the woman and anything that goes into something else is automatically male and you don’t think about the actual meaning behind what you type? What is a woman meant to be guarding? and don’t give me the ‘limited number of eggs’ crap. genetic diversity is just as much of an imperative.

      If women were allowed to play the field and find out what they like they wouldn’t need to rely on the man to have knowledge and experience (which is silly anyway because every woman reaches climax differently), she would know what she likes and be better able to instruct her partner on how to please her.

      “i can assure you the acceptance you think there is or should be, is an impossibility” google bonobos.

      The idea that women can’t be promiscuous makes men look incredibly hypocrtical for the years and years of being promiscuous themselves.

      You want to know why women “shouldn’t” be promiscuous? because men get their panties in a twist over it. it is an observable male trait to attempt to force an otherwise promiscuous female into giving one, or a small number, of males exclusive mating privileges. It’s not because there is any reason why it is better for women, it’s because men want to be sure that any offspring are theirs, and we have paternity testing for that now, so we can stop telling women how they’re allowed to behave and what their allowed to do, and making them feel like “worthless locks” if the don’t cater to your fragile ego.

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  • UoM Blog

    Posted on April 28, 2013

    Women are the gate keepers of sex, for a woman to sleep around it takes no effort, men are the gate keepers of commitment. It’s a traditional gender role, hence when men sleep around its commended as it takes more effort than what it does for women.

    Everyone has the right to evaluate their partner, and to be honest with you sexual pasts can be something that bothers them. I mean, rationalise and reframe it any way you want but there’s research out there indicating the more men a woman sleeps with the higher cheating risk she is. We all know that the more penises a woman has had within her means the less likely that one penis will satisfy her. Of course men are allowed to evaluate you before committing.

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    • Anonymous

      Posted on February 21, 2014

      “We all know that the more penises a woman has had within her means the less likely that one penis will satisfy her” No. No we do not all “know” this. That is absolute bullshit. You clearly have no idea what you are talking about. I’ve been with more than one guy in my life and i felt no increasing desire to sleep around as the number of past partners i’ve had grew. an orgasm is an orgasm. i don’t have 50 vibrators lying around either, one does the job.

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  • Jeff

    Posted on August 11, 2013

    Im 28, good looking, and a healthy happy guy. Even with good looks and being socially attune I still get rejected often. Of course I get rejected, thats a big part of being a guy. I just get up, dust off and get back in there. I’d say 1 out of 8 girls I talk to I have a chance for sparks, and those odds are a lot better than most guys I talk to.

    The point being, guys are the pursuers. We chase women until we get “lucky”. It’s called getting lucky for a reason. Meanwhile a 5/10 female can go to the bar and walk out hand in hand within 10 minutes. Sadly in this hook up culture many women are doing so. I have no shame in admitting that I have only been with 8 women.

    I look young, so I can date a wide range of women. I often date women ages 19 – 30. All have had 2 – 6 times the amount I have with the median being in the 30 count. I have no problem with women sleeping around. What I do have a problem is with women feeling entitled to men accepting it. I don’t want to spend my life with someone who has given themselves away so much.

    I came on here because I am in a very undecided place. I am not happy in America for many reasons, but much to do with women. The comments about lying to men so they don’t know make me sick. Maybe the grass isn’t greener on the other side, but anything is better than this.

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    • Anonymous

      Posted on February 22, 2014

      “What I do have a problem is with women feeling entitled to men accepting it. I don’t want to spend my life with someone who has given themselves away so much.” so….you have a problem with women sleeping around.

      I have a problem with guys being jerks. i don’t date jerks because of it. and i’m honest about it.

      lets replace ‘women sleeping around’ in your statement with ‘homosexuals’ and see how it sounds. “I don’t have a problem with homosexuals. What I do have a problem is with homosexuals feeling entitled to men accepting it.”

      Report this comment

  • Shiva

    Posted on October 29, 2013

    From where I come from, South India, both men and women are whores if they sleep around a lot. We aren’t sexist. We have a whore word for both the genders.

    Any way, western civilization seems to get only more messed up as time moves on. :-)

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  • Anonymous

    Posted on January 26, 2014

    i dont get this why would you want to sleep around theres lots of double standards against men too so theres no need for you whinning and why would you want to sleep around? do you really think any guy would stay with you much longer then a couple years? hell no im a guy and while sex is good too many partners is major red flag and if you never want to find mr right then keep doing what your doing doesnt effect me none it only looks bad on yourself

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    • Anonymous

      Posted on February 22, 2014

      when someone tells you a problem they’re facing, do you always respond with “oh yeah? well i have problems too!!”

      nobody here said that there aren’t double standards against men. THIS IS A BAD THING FOR BOTH GENDERS.

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    • Anonymous

      Posted on February 22, 2014

      Believe it or not, feeling physical attraction for someone but no emotional connection is not a magical power only males possess. Do whichever unfortunate woman who has been trained to think she can do no better than you, assuming there is one, a favor and google ‘clitoris’ after you finish reading this.

      Report this comment

  • Anonymous

    Posted on August 24, 2014

    Most women nowadays sleep around so very much, and they just can’t commit to just only one man.

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  • Mike

    Posted on August 26, 2014

    Why is everyone automatically assuming her boyfriend is being a sexist or having a double standard. She doesn’t’ explain why he hasn’t had many partners, did he CHOOSE to not sleep around or were women not buying what he was selling. No one here points out the obvious thing, maybe he doesn’t like to sleep around because he doesn’t’ view sex that way and he’s uncomfortable that his girlfriend clearly does. That’s not a double standard, that’s expecting from others what you expect from yourself, it’s a personal choice.

    If a guy doesn’t like the idea of sleeping around he shouldn’t date a women who does because it’s a relationship doomed to fail. It’ll always be on his mind that she slept with THAT many guys, whatever the total number might be, let me tell you the idea that your lady has been with a dozen, two dozen or more guys in every which way is a big turn off.

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  • AJ

    Posted on December 26, 2014

    I personally wouldn’t have a problem if she slept around a lot. All I care about is if this girl is in love with me. Guys egos are just sensitive because the idea of other men sleeping with their women hurts them emotionally cause maybe it makes them think that they aren’t anything special to their women that you can be tossed aside easily as those men. They like to think they are special to you. Now in me saying that women may respond by saying ‘He’s possessive or insecure.’ everybody is , this is just how a guys mind works. Also because if you hadn’t notice other guys can be real assholes to make you think your girl is not special when she is to you which is why your still with her.
    The fact that you are thinking of breaking up with your boyfriend of 3 years because of this little insecurity just shows how immature your mind is in that relationship. I mean he’s still with you isn’t he? And you are the one that wants to consider that when it’s not even your problem, it just shows he loves you. Which is also why i don’t believe this post, it just seems like a made up story for a feminsit point to be made cause if anyone was with somebody for 3 years a little problem like that wouldn’t be enough to end it.

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    • Terry

      Posted on January 13, 2015

      I agree it’s about guys egos and because guys always want to win. Win as in being the first one to hit it, the first one she loved, the only man she thinks about and the only man she’ll give it up to. Guys don’t like to lose-fights, games, and women-we just don’t like to lose. To be the 15th man she let tap that would be losing in a man’s mind. Not agreeing with it just stating facts. We as men have to learn to take the “L” sometimes and stop trying to get the “W” all the time because you can’t win %100 of the time. If your lady sees guys she banged in the past and they comment on it, the best thing would be to just ignore them and walk on by.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted on February 5, 2015

    Then what about love…
    Once a slut, always a slut

    Well, there’s always the obvious…you could get pregnant, despite the birth control or condoms.

    On a more serious note though…you lose respect for yourself. The more guys you sleep with, the less they respect you (people will know about this, no matter how hard OP from the other thread tries to hide it), and the less you respect yourself. This is an odd analogy…but it works: Say you’re a tissue, and you sleep with one guy…it’s kinda like him blowing his nose on you. Every time you sleep with a guy, he blows on the tissue-so by the time you’ve slept around 5 or 6 times…you’re kind of disgusting…

    When you feel like this, you lose your sense of self-worth. Not to mention, sleeping around makes getting married and it actually working out extremely difficult. Say later on in life, after you’ve slept around with lots of guys…and you meet this really great guy who wants to marry you (the OP in that thread said she doesn’t plan on telling her husband about this challenge) and then on your wedding night, when you two are having sex for the first time, what is your mind going to be on? Your husband…or all those guys you had sex with before, and how your husband compares to them in bed? Do you really want all that running through your head?

    Not to mention, it’s going to make it difficult for either of you to stay in the marriage if you both slept around before getting married. Why? Because you’ll be so used to going from guy to guy that you’ll never be pleased with just one partner. After a while, one or both of you will get physically tired of the other, and you’ll both move on to a new source. Sleeping around really messes with the concept of commitment.

    Also, society….it is not considered “normal” therefore we shun it. There is really nothing bad about sleeping around, but our egos and fear of what others will think make us think of it as bad and dirty.

    Anyways, I hope all this helps…and in the end, it’s their choice. I just hope that they realise that their actions now will either come back in a positive, or negative way when their older…

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  • Katherine Marie Taylor

    Posted on February 5, 2015

    How could you think about leaving your boyfriend for just willing to have sex with handful of other guys. Then you can’t be in a serious relationship anyday till you will be wasted. Clearly, you are eighter had sex for money, your mom was a slut, you are taking out your frustrations on sex for guys or you don’t want a happy marriage, don’t want to be a good mother or either a good wife.

    From all my experiences I found sleeping around is a jerk. Lack of respect for each other, lack of careness, just a fake and a f**king sex.
    We all have the right to love and being loved. We are all human beings.
    Its not needed to be in 2012, 3012 or 4012 to sleep around. Its very easy for a women to sleep around with a guy because guys just need a place for sex.
    Although, there is no DoubleStandards because sleeping aroound is always wrong for both men and women.
    Things like love, happiness, respect, culture, tradition, morals exists if and only if we all having heart, soul and a beatiful mind.
    The other hand, the more partners you have in your past, the greater chances of having a severe divorces.
    Give some efforts to love. We are not animals. We can’t just follow sex.
    If not saying sex is a bad thing or either pre-marital relationship is a bad thing. Have sex, have a lot, lot of sex, but have that in a monogamous relationship for a happy marriage, for saving marriage and to prevent divorces.

    Sex is a learning experience for everyone, and if you both approach it as virgins, it’s even more special because you’re learning together! Sex is also the most important thing in a marriage, though it’s a wonderful perk.

    The most important I would like say all women that never let anyone use you. Have a good and lot of sex with a healthier one. Have love, respect and careness for each other. This will make your life a paradise. Trust me, you got it.

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  • Alicia Garcia

    Posted on February 9, 2015

    Totally agreed Katherine, that’s Why women today are losing the ability to love, and how men must adjust.
    If a young woman today said she was saving her virginity for her husband, she’d be considered hopelessly old fashioned. She’d be treated with disdain, as polite society treated a whore 100 years ago.
    This is a measure of the triumph of Satanism, the “religion” of the modern world, which lurks behind secularism. Not coincidentally, virgins also had to hide their purity in Bolshevik Russia.
    The defining characteristic of civilization is the consecration of sex to marriage, or at the very least, love and courtship. Marriage and family are the red blood cells of a healthy society and the basis for procreation.

    Satanists understand this very well. That’s why they used “sexual liberation,” to undermine humanity. As Giuseppe Mazzini said,  “we corrupt in order to conquer.”
    They are like the devil. Corruption is a form of conquest. Enslavement takes the form of addiction, to sex or drugs or alcohol.
    Any animal can have anonymous sex. It is human to form a permanent loving bond and raise children properly. This is why Satanists use free love to attack marriage.

    The more sexual partners a young woman has, the less she is able to love a man. A woman’s love must be exclusive. It must be focused on her husband, the father of her children. She must preserve her soul for him. That’s what her body represents.
    For a woman, sex is an act of self-sacrifice and surrender. By definition, it requires trust, i.e. love and devotion to one man. When she has casual sex, inevitably she is disappointed and feels used. She starts to hate men and falls victim to feminism and lesbianism.
    When men were required to get married in order to have sex, women were courted and loved. Later, they were honored for their contributions as wife and mother. Far from protecting “women’s rights,” feminism has left women twisting in the wind.
    The separation of sex from marriage, i.e. “sexual liberation,” is one of the principle ways satanism has killed love.
    Wanton sex has become a substitute for love. Young women now market themselves as sex partners, not wives and mothers.  Men are also trained to seek sex.
    “Homosexual rights” are designed to make heterosexuals behave like homosexuals. Very few homosexuals marry. Very few have children. This is the model the elite envisages for mankind.
    The Illuminati want us to be isolated, alienated and tractable.
    A woman who is saving herself for marriage should be commended. She is resisting social pressure ( i.e. social engineering ) and obeying her instincts instead.

    Through the mass media, the Illuminati brainwash us to think romantic love and sex are a universal panacea that can replace religion (God.)
    How many movies and songs are based on the assumption that some perfect person is going to give us our self? Woody Allen is 75 and he’s still chasing this romantic chimera in his movies. This is arrested development.
    People aren’t meant to be loved as though they were perfect. No one is. Only God is perfect and that is where our love should be directed. I define God in terms of spiritual ideals such as truth, justice, goodness and beauty.
    Especially now when fewer men and women are capable of love, we need to focus on loving God and, especially, on God’s love for us.
    The Illuminati have done a good job of discrediting God. He is the positive force behind Creation. He represents the inherent moral and natural design. By adhering to this design, we will be healthy and happy.

    In olden times, men chose women for their worth as helpmates. Can she cook? Milk cows? Make clothes? They had no illusions about “soul mates.” Men need to look for women who are gentle and accommodating, who have skills, character, personality and make good mothers.
    Avoid promiscuous women, feminists and women who are alienated from their fathers. Avoid bean counters (women who want everything to be “equal.”)
    We need to take the stardust out of our eyes and realize that the importance of sex has been grossly exaggerated in order to control us.
    Men are attracted to almost all fertile women. So what? That’s nature’s way of making sure we procreate. We don’t need to be controlled by that.
    In marriage, we are looking for a life-long companion. Look at old TV shows to see the traditional picture of marriage. It’s not heaven. Lucille Ball and Desi Arnez; Ralph and Alice Kramden were always comically at odds. It never gets boring.
    Marriage is a mutual security pact. A woman accepts her husband’s leadership in return for his protection and love. Men want power; women want love. Marriage is the exchange of the two.
    Your spouse is nothing like you. There’s going to be disagreements. It’s not necessary to think alike or feel love all the time. Many women are moody.
    Just keep your bargain. Be loyal. Don’t say things that will upset her.
    Play your part. And over time, with mutual trust, a strong bond grows.
    And if you can’t find a suitable companion, you may be in luck. Thoreau, a bachelor, said, “I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude.”

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  • Joya Taylor

    Posted on February 10, 2015

    I don’t f**cking care about who sleeps with whom wth how many times and how much ?
    I loved a guy (my bestfriend forever, my childish sweetheart, my soulmate and my first and the last love) for 11 years. Rather I marry him and create a happy and a healthy family together. Not to mention, have a lots of sex.

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  • Daniel Smith

    Posted on February 10, 2015

    Truly, quality over quantity.
    But the f*cking main problem is, some f*ck just don’t understand the meaning of love, can’t feel the intensive feeling of a monogamous relationship because they never truly loved by anyone. They’re just being used for their f*cking little pussy, f*cking used by them and f*cking thrown away. So why, they think this is life where people are just born to f*ck each other. They still don’t know that beyond f*cking the life is much beautiful. Feeling kinda sorry for them, but nobody really cares about them, nobody teaches them about it.
    So, why they can’t experience the meaningful love where there is a joy of caring each others and get respect from.
    They just want to f*ck, being f*cked and f*cked again and again and again.

    I am 34 and a well-rich man who is loving a girl for 20 years when I was just 14 and she was 13. I feel proud and glad that we’re each others first partners and waited till we got married. Its been 8 years of our most happy marriage and we have a better and better sex life through time.

    My mama and daddy were not each others first dating partners, but they’re too each others first loving and sexual partners. They still have a respectful, prestigious loving life that what I followed and get inspired from. Moreover, my mama teach me the advantages of a monogamous relationship, and now I am enjoying it.
    So why, I always want that all people should understand themselves and get what I got in my life.

    So people, give love a priorty and enjoy the intensive feeling of love like never before. Love is not gone. Its still exist today, you just have to feel the tide. First try and then tell is it or not.
    Best of Luck.

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  • Prof. Sally Coulson

    Posted on February 10, 2015

    WHY CAN’T WOMEN SLEEP AROUND ?

    The real question should be……
    WHY CAN’T WOMEN EXPERIENCE THE EXTRA-INTENSIVE FEELING OF SEX ? WHY THEY’RE LOSING THE QUALITY IN BONDING OF LOVING ? WHY THEY DIVORCES MORE ? WHY THEY’RE UNABLE TO BE IN A STABLE RELATIONSHIPS (IN LOVE, MARRIAGES OR ANY COMMITMENT) ?

    The only and the only answer is,
    WOMEN SLEEP AROUND !!!

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  • Aaron Armstrong

    Posted on February 10, 2015

    Totally appreciate it, afterall got a bigger interest by reading some really outstanding and meaningful comments at lastly.
    It is not just a question that why can’t I sleep around ?, its about yourself that If you sleep around then what happen next…
    But, just don’t compare yourself to others who sleep around a lot and says its awesome and you believed it.
    Better you use your eyes and the mind by watching, learning and by observing the consequences of their lives that what happened next and how most of them ruined their own lives for this little fake, very short-time and respectless crap of enjoying thing. God not just gifted you an ‘able-to-sex’ quality, but also gifted you a beautiful mind to think about yourself not for just waiting for the stupid comment.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted on July 10, 2015

    Most of the women do a good job doing that these days.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted on April 15, 2017

    Well unfortunately there are many women nowadays that are real whores and will sleep around with so many different men every single chance they get since they have caused many marriages to be destroyed already just like mine was. It is very sad that the times have really changed today and so have the women when the past had most of the women back then knew how to commit to just only one man which most men in those days were very committed to their women as well. With all of these reality shows that they now have on TV as well as social media which it has certainly corrupted many of these women’s brains altogether now which makes it a real shame for many of us good innocent men to be able to trust another woman again.

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